Recent movements...❤

Gosh, a quite number of days have passed since my last blog... Recently, seems a lot has happened, but when I recalled back those memories, seems like only little has happened.... hm mm.....

First of all, my music school concert had finally over. It was quite fun although I was very very tired. This kind of feeling.... hm mm.... My last experience with this kind of feeling was many years ago when I was working at a tuition centre at Skudai... Well, it is good to find back this kind of feeling =). It means that I enjoyed what I was doing and I liked doing it... =)


Second, I had a spring cleaning at the music school with some other teachers there. It was great to work with others. It seems like after I work as private tutor, I had never been abled to work with others. So, I do enjoy this kind of feeling... ❤


Third, I had just watched "Harry Potter" with my hubby. It was a great movie. I do enjoyed watching it but... hm mm.... I do hope part 2 will be shown soon. I'm really expecting for it now.... Currently waiting for another movie on cinema... "Narnia"... I watched the 1st and the 2nd movie before, now expecting for the 3rd... I do like this kind of movie.... Full of fantasies, magics.... ❤

Fourth, I just visited my grandma at Ehsan Jaya with my mother. She is as fit as fiddle and I do hope to spend more time with her. It is especially great to taste her cooking. I like her cooking very very much =)


Fifth, my mum is going to Indonesia for holidays soon... Gosh, she hasn't gone I already started to miss her... hm mm... I wish just a blink of eyes, her holidays has ended and she's back =P As for auntie, she's now working so it's not so convenient for me to contact her. I do not wish to disturb her.. Well, when my mum comes back, we'll go find her and we'll go shopping together.. Shop for Christmas and new year... hohoho ❤


Finally, yesterday (29/11/10) my young son had went to hospital for injection. I do proud of this little guy. He's so brave =) and yesterday as well, my father-in-law went for an operation. I hope he'll get well soon and is able to play with his grandchildren.... ❤


As for my elder son, he goes to school every day. He really does enjoyed himself there and I'm happy for him... But, he's still ever the same... like to whine over (to us is little matter, but to him is big matter...) BIG MATTER.... =P


Christmas, one of my favourite festive is round the corner.. hohoho... I'm very excited and expecting this day to come soon....❤

Busy days...

Think like I've been very very busy till I kept forgetting to update my blog... Many things that I've done these few weeks and many many boring days have passed by as well...

First, upon knowing auntie is back, I quickly arrange a meet up with her in case she goes to work again. She is fine, very fine and we chatted a lot. We even promised to meet up in Dec to go shopping together =)

Second, my hubby's birthday and our anniversary.. I learnt to make cupcakes myself to celebrate these 2 special occasions (well, at least it's my most special day other than my own birthday, my relatives' birthday and my sons' birthday)... Hmmm..... the result was better than my last 'Masterpiece'... =P

Then, it's my music academy's concert. Frankly said, I'm very excited coz it's the first time I get the chance to participate in a concert preparation. =)

Finally, it's my students. Since it's getting holidays soon, haiz, I'm going to miss some of my students... But this is life. Nothing ever stop just for u... Even human's relationship.. Well, if we are fated to meet, we'll meet each other some days....

Talking about holidays, my most fearing problem comes... Haiz, forget about it.. I believe all's well that ends well... 船到桥头自然直。。。A very Ah Q feeling hor... No choice, keep thinking bout the problem won't make me solve it neither will it help also. So, juz let nature takes its courses...



Happy and Sad...@.@ (dated 27/10/2010)

After so many months of missing/thinking auntie, she finally called me yesterday... ^0^ She is now at home resting after some many months of busying... She brought me a bad news with her.... Her mum had died 1 month ago... I remembered seeing her mum on new year... It was only bout 9 months ago and at that moment she was as fit as fiddle... I felt sad bout that but I still hope auntie don't grieve too much... I believed her mum wants her to be happy always... ^_^

Well, enough of the sad thing, now back to the happy thing... But... what happy things I have to share lei?... Actually other than auntie called me as a surprise and happy thing... I can't think of anything else that happen around me... Working for me is not very smooth now.... School holidays coming and I still haven't thought of a way to earn more money to cover my monthly expenses.....

Haiz,...... really headache thinking of this.... :-S

crying.... crying... crying.... crying.... crying....crying... crying... crying.... crying.... crying... crying... crying....

4-month after auntie left... (dated 11/10/2010)

My bb is now 5-month-old. Next Mon he'll be going back to hosp to hv his normal check-up. Sound strange but whenever he's bout to hv his check-up, he falls sick...

He's now 5-month-old, meaning he's sick for every month (5 months!!!!!!!!!!) Seeing him so sick, makes me feel heartache... But I can do nothing to it except give him more water and rest... My elder son is sick as well... Whenever he is sick, he tends to be a bit 'manja'... Sometimes when I'm busy, frankly say, I hate to hear him crying over small things or playing tantrum... But I can understand why he's like that...

Now's October, I wonder what's auntie been doing and is she fine.... To my calculation as she told me last time, she should be working right now.. She will only be free during Nov/Dec... I hope I manage to put aside some time for visiting her by then...

These few weeks, my emotion is unpredictable.. Quite moody... Quite... depressed... Maybe some pressure is pressing me hard till I hardly breathe and took rest... Well, I hope these kind of feelings will disappear soon...

My 1st Attempt Baking Cupcakes 0(n_n)0 (dated 08/10/10)

Hoo..Hoo... Since my son and my niece loved eating cakes so much, I decided to learn to bake some. And since my niece is allergy to milk and eggs... I've to rack my brain and search high and low for the substitute ingredients...

However, since I'm just a beginner, I actually don't know what can these ingredients be replaced with... @.@ So, in the end, I use water instead of milk and egg yolk only instead of whole eggs...

For the 1st attempt, I gave myself 60-70 marks (considering a success ^^) Other than a bit too sweet and oily, everything's good (This is the comment/feedback from my hubby). My son and niece simply loved it and finished it in no time n_n

I hope that next time when I try baking some cupcakes, it'll be better than this time ^^

 

Oh... yesterday (10/10/10), I tried baking the Milo cupcakes again.. This time it's not too sweet and oily, but it's too thin in flavour (not sweet enough) and a bit dry... @.@

But something cheered me. My small son, he finally managed to flip over, yeah... n_n Well done, Beibei... keep it up ^^

Sunny, Rainy, Cloudy... Weather changes... =S (dated 01/10/10)

These few days, my temper is like weather... Sometimes sunny, sometimes rainy, sometimes cloudy and sometimes thunderstorm...

Even myself, I don't know why!!! Maybe it's because of pressure... maybe it's because of the true weather is really..... unpredictable... People will face pressure all the times. When pressure comes, they tend to be temperamental and I guess the pressure now comes knocking at my doorstep...

Which pressure is the most hateful of all? To me, I think it's living pressure.... Working pressure -> can be solved once the work is done. Family pressure -> after communication and understanding, mutual trust gained, everything's fine. Living pressure -> ???? can't think of a suitable solution currently... Perhaps, we have to be contented in life (), then only we won't feel pressurized ().

Easier said than done... In current society, without sufficient "capital" to support whole family, how to live in contentment? I would very much love to live in contentment... but currently, I can only say "NO"...

I hope in future, I can proudly say "YES" and I hope that day won't be too far away from me...

Today's weather forecast: Morning    -> thunderstorm (frustrated)
                                        Afternoon -> cloudy (moody)
                                        Evening    -> cloudy (moody)
                                        Night       -> sunny (happy)

p/s: Today is Children's Day. Happy Children's Day to my Baobao & Beibei =)

My Beloved Father ..❤..❤

Yesterday (27/09/2010) I went visiting my father at Sg. He looks more energetic and I feel happy for him. I feel lucky that he's still around. I can still see him...


I hope he can live long... At least another year (if possible).. I do hope I can find time to spend with him more... May god helps my father and blesses him...


Father, I ❤ you. I wish u good health and happy... ^^

 
 
 

 
 

My 1st Son's Birthday ..❤

 


Time flies... My precious one is celebrating his 3-year-old birthday ^^ This little guy is really adorable. His speech (sometimes) makes me laugh and mad. His behaviour and attitude (sometimes) amuses me and annoys me. His bad temper really upsets me.... Overall, he's my precious baby ..❤


He is a gift from god to me, he is a gem so precious to me that I hope I can protect, love and stay with him always ^^


阿宝宝贝，生日快乐。祝你永远健康，快乐。妈咪爱你哦 。。❤。。❤

Happy Mid Autumn Festival (n_n)

Today is moon cakes festival aka lantern festival aka mid autumn festival =)

This year is the 2nd year my Baobao celebrates mid autumn festival and it's the 1st time my Beibei celebrates it (n_n)

On this day, my desire for hoping my wish will come true is stronger... I do really really hope my wish will come true..... @.@

Well, forgot bout the unhappy things 1st..... Be happy to celebrate today is more realistic..... XD

As time goes by... @_@ (dated 19/09/2010)

As time goes by... I've been teaching for 8 years. The moment of fear is approaching soon... SCHOOL HOLIDAYS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

One year after another year, every times when year-end's drawing near, my fear will automatically creep-out from no where... Being a teacher really isn't easy. Being a tuition teacher (for me only), is worst... (no matter how I like this job), I had to face the reality that my students will graduate and will say sayonara to me... I will have to face this cruel 'departure' of my students and worst, hear from them no more...

Another thing--- money. Em... even though I'm not the bread-winner in my family, I still don't like this feeling... The feeling of no money, the feeling of jobless, the feeling of.... whatever that matters... =S AND I believe nobody likes this kind of feeling as me... =.=

Whenever year-end comes, I'll ask myself what to do, where to get new students and money, where to go, etc... In the end, I got no answers to these questions.... However, these questions haunted me like shadows every year again and again!!!!!!!!!!!!! OMG @_@

But no matter what, I won't say myself pathetic coz I'm not pathetic at all... There are people out there more pathetic than I'm but still face their lives bravely... All I can say is.... LIFE IS FULL OF UNPREDICTABILITY!!!!!.................  =.=

3 months after auntie left...(dated 11/09/2010)

3 months after auntie left...

Just a blink of eyes, my Beibei is now 4-month-old and this represented that auntie had gone back for 3 months... I still miss her.. especially when today is mid autumn festival. I remembered year 2008 mid autumn, she was here with us coz my sister was doing her confinement... But at that moment, I din have the chance to celebrate with her coz I went to Malacca with my hubby... (@.@)

On National Day (31/08/10), I was intended to find auntie and took her for a trip to Kukup. I had even bought her a new blouse/shirt... But too bad that she wasn't around. She had gone to work at JB, I supposed... I believe after this, she will be at Singapore... Haiz, I guess I'll still have to wait till Dec '10 to see her...

Hope she's fine always and I look forward to see her in the end of the year... AND happy mid autumn festival to u, auntie (n_n)

My Dear Father ❤..❤.. (dated 02/09/2010)

Today, after my last visit to my father (2/5/10), I finally got to see him again. This time see him, he's a bit chubby liao =) After undergoing so much, I'm glad he's OK. Although he can't talk, he uses his own way to try to communicate with people around him... His eyes and some simple hand signs...

I feel contented for being able to see my father again. And I'm most happy that he's able to see his little grandchild... Bei bei...❤.. Now, my wish is hoping that 15/09/2010 will come soon so that I can take my Bei bei to have his passport done and we can go to Singapore to visit my father as frequent as I can =)

Outing to Kukup... ❤..❤.. (dated 31/08/2010)

Today going outing with my family to Kukup. Very tiring but it was fun. I like the fun of going out together with my family. It's good way to strenghten our bonds and let the kids enjoyed themselves in the nature... =)

Remembered our last outing was to Kluang and Batu Pahat and oh... it was a year ago... on National Day as well ... =) And after that trip, I found out I was pregnant with 1 month.. =)

On our way home, my sister got saman for overtaking car at double line... 200 bucks flied away... oh hoho... god bless you, sis ... =P

Hmmm.... next time, where should we be going lei?.... Let me think think and plan plan... =)

Precious Memories... Faded Memories... @@

Precious Memories... Faded Memories...(dated 17/08/2010)

Having tidying and sorting out my baby's mittens and booties, I got a sour feeling... A feeling of unwilling to let go... I fear if I let go, I'll forget all the beautiful experiences and memories that I shared with auntie and of course with my baby as well... Even though I know such day will come sooner or later, I try to convince myself not to think of it. However, the day has come... Now, I am forced to sort out those clothes that my baby can no longer wear. Later, I will be forced to stop breastfeeding him (even though I really wished I had enough to feed him till he is 6-month-old)... Haiz, time really flies... I only hope all these beautiful and precious memories will never faded from my memory ='(

Two Months After Auntie Left

Still thinking of auntie occasionally. Whenever I am free, I would think of her. Wondering what she is doing lately...

My 2nd son is now 3-month-old. He's a cute little guy who loves to smile and laugh a lot ^^ He's now more and more like his brother except... I think he's much chubbier than his brother.

My 1st son is almost 3-year-old. He had grown a lot but till loves to cry a lot. Sometimes, I do feel annoy by his cries but that the way children act ^^

I've resumed my piano class. It's great to learn back piano because I really love piano (even though I'm still not good at it and sometimes a bit lazy =P)

The year has come to middle but my another new-year-resolution not yet fulfilled. I do hope it will fulfill by this year...

My sister has started working. All the best to her. For your children, for your future, ganbatte ne!!

Oh! Today is my sister's birthday. May her wishes fulfilled. Another 4 days will be her daughter's birthday. Time does travel fast. She is now 2-year-old. Happy Happy Birthday!!

My Lucky Day...

Today is my birthday. Happy Birthday to myself and may all the wishes I wished for will all come true... (Hopefully ^^)~~~~~~

Two of my friends sent me their wishes (Thks San San, Thks Chai Ling ^^). Sounds like very pathetic. I got quite a number of friends but only two of them remembered this day... ='(

During this day, other than eating my birthday cake alone, I'm still alone =S. My hubby is sick, my sister and brother went to SG to work, my mommy is busy with the kids and my children are still young to help me celebrate...

Haiz, never mind about these... So long as my wishes will all come true. But will they really come true???...
Oops!!!! I forgot to capture my birthday cake photo!!! Now only left leftover......

yummy, yummy ^^

A month after auntie goes home...

Sometimes, I really do hope auntie is around. When I stay at home alone, I do miss her very very much. I still can see her images at my house doing this and doing that. When I felt stressful looking after my baby or bathing my baby, I would recall the scenes when she was around. I would say to myself, "if auntie is around, at this hour my baby will be with her", "if auntie is around, at this moment I would have finished eating and am resting now", "if auntie is around, at this time she must have been resting and watching television with me" and so on...

08/07/2010, I sent her a sms even though I knew she did not know how to open smses. In the message, I wrote:

“AUNTIE，你好吗？开工了吗？阿贝很好，我也很好，可是我们都很想念你哦！等我有空而你也在家的时候我们才去找你 SHOPPING，好吗？=）”

I hope this day will come soon. I can't wait to see auntie again...

Pathetic Friendship... @_@

Surfing Facebook, searching for old friends, browsing their friends' list make me stunned and I suddenly had a feeling of... pathetic!!

I wonder what kind of person am I in the past? A monster? An annoyance? A troublemaker? A spoilsport? ... etc?? I guessed... I must have been very hateful...

Their lists are all full with our schoolmates... Schoolmates that I also knew... They still keep in touch with each other... EXCEPT me...

I still think a lot of them actually. I do miss them but to my dismay, I guessed that is all only my wishful thoughts. Silly me... @_@ They might have totally forgotten about me. They might even ask who am I? Do I know you?...

Haiz, what can I say and do? I can only accept the reality and the fact that ... I am the Forgotten One!! Just like what my student wrote, "We would not have forever friends, neither do we have forever enemies"... I think I need to "See Open A Bit"... =(

20 days after auntie left...

20 days after auntie left.
I still missed her. I wonder what's she been doing lately? Has she started her next job? Everytime when I went out, I would think of her saying that she needs this, she needs that. This is the thing/food she wants to buy... Sometimes, I have the urge to buy the things for her. But when I realised I wasn't staying near her neither am I going to visit her, I told myself wait... Wait till year-end when I'm free and she is available first. Haiz, she's really like a mommy to me now... I think of her just like I think of my mother. I like her and love her, just like I like my mother... =S

My bb now is about 1 and a 1/2-month-old. He's really very cute @_@

When I looked at him, all my troubles and worries disappeared. It's really good to have him and his brother around.

But his brother is quite naughty nowadays. Maybe because of anxieties. The anxieties of fearing being ignored, being alone, being not loved...

Don't worry, my dear. You and your little brother are daddy and mommy's precious gifts from god. We will always love you =)

With 2 boys around, I'm still not quite adjusted to my time. Haiz, looks like I'll have to postpone my piano lesson till August...

Hopefully, I'll be ready by then. I don't wish to disappoint my piano teacher and I hope I'm ready to take the exam by next year...

13 days after auntie left...

13 days after auntie left...

I still miss auntie a lot but I tried to keep myself occupied in order not to miss her too much.
I did a lot of house chores, I kept myself busy with computer games, I watched lot of dramas, etc...

However, when I came across the familiar dramas that I used to watch with auntie (Lucky stars, 3 daddies and 1 mummy, woman of steel, I must success, etc...) I would think of auntie.
When came to breakfast, lunch and dinner time, I would think of auntie's delicious food.
When my baby needed to drink milk, needed to take bath, bedtime, I would think of auntie.

I keep telling myself it's ok. Auntie stays quite near (Pontian), I can go visiting her whenever she is available and I'm free. In this way, my heart will feel better.. However, why did I still feel a lack of something? Why did I still feel depress? Why did I still feel my house is missing somebody? Haiz~~~~~~~~~

If only time can turn back, how I wished I could be like my son, so carefree, so innocent, so~~~~ cute... And most of all, auntie is still at my house, accompanying me... XD

Not Used To .... =S

Just as suddenly when everythings back to normal, I'm really not quite used to it. I'm not used of having 2 children, I'm not used of having flat tummy, I'm not used of having to wake up early now, I'm not used of staying at home all day looking after the children and most important, I'm not used of auntie not around me, helping me and taking care of me and my children. I really missed the confinement period where auntie was around helping me, taking care of me, and chatting with me to kill the bore (after birth woman usually faced). Sometimes when doing chores or watching the dramas I used to watch with auntie, I'll think of her. I really really do miss her a lot. I wonder what she's been doing lately. I remembered she said she'll be going for a holiday this weekend. So, I guessed she must be enjoying herself now =)

Well, school holidays will end soon. My son will be going to school and I'll be going to work. I'm actually quite scared to face those after so many weeks of rest.... I scared I'm not used to it anymore... With so many not used to..... I really don't know what to do =S   

Haiz, no matter how many not used to, I still have to face the reality... However, I'll make it a habit to visit auntie at least once a year. Everythings that auntie had taught me during my confinement, I'll always remember and make them a habit as well. Thanks to auntie, my house has become more and more 'systematic', more ordered, and cleaner  =P